Mapping Totem Animals on My Chakras Using AI and Pissing Everyone Off

So, it seems I’m either a Voltron of cultural appropriation, or a Karen sharing a world with mystics and animals of whom I should never speak.

You’re a woman of French-Canadian roots and a history of trauma under the Catholic Church. What should you invoke, a meat pie?

My friend, Terrence, says his spirit animal is a hamburger. One thing I’ve stolen is that joke.

Muladhara: Watersnake

You can blame it on the asshole uncle

who killed the Northern Watersnake

for no reason, snatching it by the tail

and whipping her head against a rock.

Kids shrieked and cleared the beach

where she thrashed and struck my towel.

Hot panic rose to my throat, nosedived,

exited my body as a flood of warm piss.

The snake musked to survive the attack.

Brown lacquer smeared across the sand -

odor so foul it unfroze me. I ran into water

to rinse, watching her instincts slacken.

Careful, my uncle told kids inching forward,

Fucker can still bite, even after it’s dead.

I dipped under for my terrible prayer.

Wicked man - we should live to spite him.

Now, she’s coiled at my root, unspooling

to glide through rivers dark with blood.

Submerged, safe, the skins she sheds

are mine. Whether you like it or not.

Svadhisthana: Honey Bee

My waggle-dance lands you in my fronds.

After, you stay in bed to read about Lenin.

I take a French shower, swipe lipstick and kohl,

head out for the primal sting of a stiff drink.

Foraging for sweetness, I’ll dance with anyone -

hothouse exotic, wildflower, houseplant, weed.

Sweat-slick, I’ll boogie ‘til an ungodly hour

then Uber home, shoulders dusted with gold.

Manipura: Horse

Designed for horizons and vaulted skies.

Canny of herd, predator, panorama.

Okay with saddle, even spur to the rib,

but will abruptly buck an asshole and bolt.

Anahata: Horseshoe Crab

Horseshoe crabs

survived the asteroid

that wiped out

the dinosaurs.

450 million years old,

more arachnid than crustacean,

their blue blood glows

under black light.

A quart of blood

sells for $15,000.

Used to test injectables

- vaccines and IV drugs -

their amebocytes

can identify bacteria

that would try

to kill us.

Once, at Thomas Point,

I came upon a washed up

combat helmet, American,

circa World War II.

Nope. Horseshoe crab.

Dressed in ancient armor,

she said it was time.

Protect the core.

Vishuddha: Skunk

Stop expecting the Virgin Mary

when you know damn well

I’m Pepé Le Pew.

Ajna: Hawk

A mind that is all logic

is a like a knife that is all blade.

Reading that quote invoked

Red-tailed and Broad-winged,

the Cooper’s that whistled over

ours heads to nab the baby chick.

Sahasrara: Great Blue Heron

Shut the fuck up.

Ferme la bouche.

Stop complaining.

Shush. Listen!

A still, small voice.

A song on the wind.

Wait, then.

Snatch it!

Great Blue Heron spears

Northern watersnake.

Heron eats her,

head first.

By tail, scales would

shred heron’s throat.

There’s the beginning,

and then, the end.

In the meantime,

a single plea.

Look around.

Next
Next

Grace